So as I’m getting older, I’m starting to realize why little things, play a big part in everybody’s lives.
How important Money is and the fact Love can be so harsh. Going back merely a few years, I couldn’t even comprehend how important money was. I’d want the latest barbie doll, or the latest iPod - anything that made me look cool and rich. I also had a next door neighbor who was 2 years younger than me, but she was pretty much little misfit, it was like a competition, you know the song? ”Anything you can do, I can do better” - yepp, that was us in a nutshell. So obviously, if she got something, I wanted to go one step bigger, so I’d nag and nag and nag my parents until they finally gave in. They couldn’t really afford it, but it was pretty much anything that would shut me up, and I darn well knew it. I knew if I kept going on about it every hour of every day, they’d get tired of it
and cave. From the moment I was born to the tender age of Fifteen, I got everything I wanted in the snap of my fingers. From 2006 to 2008 we were pretty okay for money,
went to Florida a total of 5 times, flew some of my friends out too, I got amazing gifts for my birthdays and christmases, not to mention everything in between. I was pretty spoilt. And I still am, but only now do I realize the true value of money.
We’ve been really really tight on it, I suppose like everyone else in this world.
At first it was hard, because we cut back on a lot of things that usually i’d have the pleasure of occupying daily. I acted up, I played the spoiled rich kid that wanted the new top she saw in London, but when her parents told her she couldn’t have it because they had no money - well, that was unheard of - so she dug her heels in…boy did she dig her heels in..she’d mope, she’d cry, she’d play the ‘guilt-trip’ card, but nothing.
And that, was only at the end of 2008. Only now do I realize that, I couldn’t get that top because we REALLY couldn’t afford it. Every ounce of money went towards food.
Needless to say, I’m no longer that kid anymore, I’m kinda happy with the lifestyle I have right now, even if it is pretty moneyless. We’ve been like it more than a year now, I suppose I’m used to it. And if we actually do get money and my parents offer to buy me something as a treat, I turn them down, because I know I don’t necessarily need it. But I’m not saying I’m OKAY living like this - I’m happy with it because I have no choice. I have to grin and bare it, but it doesn’t mean I don’t still pine for luxuries.
I’m attempting to save up for some hair extensions, they cost £75, but it’s hard to save when you have no money in the first place, I know, I don’t exactly need them, they’re just a luxury.. - but to be honest, they’re the only thing I’ve wanted in the WHOLE year. Usually I would have wanted game consoles, games, laptops, a new phone, camera, new trampoline .. no, in the whole year I just wanted hair extensions, for me, that’s a big deal because with each passing day I’m realizing I don’t need half the things I have. I could just get a job for the extensions, but I pretty much have no way of getting there [parents dont like me going on buses/trains on my own], jobs are hard to find nowadays, and especially .. jobs are hard to find nowadays - that pay well.
And with me starting college on the 2nd September, I can only work weekends, and I intend to leave the weekends free for my friends and family.
So it’s pretty difficult knowing I want something, but for the first time in my life, I can’t have it. I know you all think I’m being pretty shallow, that I’m spoiled? ungrateful? well, you can call me those things if you want because hey, I’m not saying I’m not those things. Though I’m definitely grateful for what I have, that’s another lesson I’ve learned recently. But if you were brought up to have pretty much everything lying at your feet, you’d feel the same when suddenly you’re cut off and told you can’t have anything for a while. I’m getting there, I still have many things to learn and many mistakes to make, slowly but surely I am getting there.
Where love is concerned?
I honestly don’t know where to begin.
I think I’ve experienced it, but I’m not here to talk about my experience, I’m here to talk about my opinions on it in general.
I have a friend..
She quite annoys me as she’s always switching from guy to guy, always saying she loves them, blahblahblah.
She once had a boyfriend, but ”fell in love” with someone else, so she broke up with that one and got with the one she ”fell in love” with. Easy, right? What annoys me though is shes now onto someone else, and she wants to leave this other one for ..the other one! Confusing?
Better? :)
If she keeps chopping and changing between boys, then she really doesn’t know the meaning of love does she?
She said Guy 2 is being a dick right now.
…So? isn’t the whole point of a relationship to love each other, good mood, bad mood?Through thick and thin? You support each other, amiright?
There’s obviously a reason for him being a dick, other wise why did she fall in love with him in the first place.
It annoys me, girls go through so many boys who they cherish and adore…until the next one comes along.
In that case, then they don’t know the meaning of the word love.
Though, nor do I..who does? But at least I don’t go through trails of boys, I stay faithful, and if I have a boyfriend, I’m not looking for anyone else, therefore I’m not interested. Yeah, maybe I’ll think someones attractive, but I wouldn’t dare leave the boyfriend for that one, at the end of the day, I fell in love with the boyfriend for a reason - let’s keep it that way.
I also hate how boys have to like a multiple amount of girls, it’s never just one.
And they’re never happy with the one they have.
I’ve been hurt and screwed around so much. I liked [not loved] liked, a boy, who had a string of other girls just like me - no way would I trust him. I was practically one of his, ”robots” I guess and after that, I wasn’t interested. If someone likes me, they’ll like me because I’m me, Charlotte, I’m no one else, and they will never turn me into anybody else - if they try, then they are completely out of my life. I don’t like it when somebody likes me but they like so many other people as well - what’s the point? They immediately lose my trust and faith in them, and they’re the two things that are completely vital in a relationship.
In a way, I’m happy to be single - sure I’d like a boyfriend but then again, I think I’d be self conscious the whole time. Boys aren’t worth the hassle.
For now, my head is gonna be focused on my acting career.
